Objections to Micro Swimsuits

 

I have always had a problem with wearing micro swimsuits. I love the designs and everything but I just cannot seem to fit inside them the way that I should. Every time I sit down in one of these micros, I end up slipping out of one side or the other. It’s not that I mind slipping out now and then, but the people on the beach seem to take it a little more seriously than I do. I have even been escorted off the beach by the beach patrol guys because I slipped out while getting out of the water one day. Of course, that happened on a family beach so you can see how people were upset.

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The funny thing about that is the beach patrol guys really liked the micro swimsuits designs and did not see what the problem was although they did see why kids did not need to be an audience to that sort of thing. Of course they still had to escort me off the beach but they thought that it was wrong that I had to go. They have seen women slipping out of their bathing suits a lot more than any guy has and no one said anything negative about it. But let a man show off a bit of testicle and everyone goes ape shit over it. After all, it’s not like I intentionally slip a nut out of the side of my swimsuit.

I do my best to keep my micro swimsuits at home these days until I can find a design that will allow me to walk down the beach comfortably and without worry. I do still keep wearing them to the tanning salon most of the time but I do not have to worry about anyone seeing me there. One of these days they are going to create a design for guys like me that have extra-large testicles so that we can wear our micros out on the beach and have fun like everyone else. I just hope that day gets here before I get too old to go out on the beach and worry about my nuts showing. Om the meantime, I do enjoy wearing my micros to special parties.